Now, think with me on this....did I give up the ability to smoke cigarets? Of course not. Did I give up the desire to smoke? Not right away. So what did I give up? I gave up the activity, I put the role of cigarette smoker way back in my role repertoire closet. I took it out and tried it on with a cigar about a year ago but it didn't fit anymore so I put back in the closet.
The key for me, and the key I am recommending for you is to learn new roles. You don't have to throw any role away...you just have to decide to learn new roles that give you a better range of behavior.
A helpful way of looking at all of this is to begin to understand yourself as what you cannot avoid being; that is an actor. Again, please stop shaking your head...we are always in action, we are always in role, that is not pretense, it is the way we, oh, what is the word?
That's it, of course *we inter act with each other*.
We are always in relationship. When I am sleeping alone I am in relationship to my mattress and pillow and my dreams.
(the next blog will begin looking at our different roles)